Oct 17, 2024
Day 1: Facebook Dating
So the first dating app I'm doing is Facebook Dating. Why? Cause it's free and easy cause I'm already on Facebook (I have no idea why I still am). I set up my dating profile using this stellar photo that I took the other day when I found this crumpled hat someone gave me from a BBQ joint.
Yeah yeah, not a great photo, but not too bad, either. I mean, if I wanted quality I probably wouldn't be on a dating site. I had to pick a few things I liked, so I choose grilling, fishing, restaurants, atv's (cause QUADS wasn't an option, haha), and vacations. It's not like everyone needs to know everything. I added some photos...me at Applebees toasted on Zombie kooliade, Bass and the sunrise, and my Ranger. Dumb shit. But by golly look how playful I am! Growlll..... haha
Then, all I had to do was open the part and click X or the heart so the app can figure out what type of dudes I "like". Now, I found that difficult for a few reasons...first, I care much more about how funny and entertaining someone is than what they look like...my real friends can attest to that. And, I also think men are stupid and post the dumbest photos ever.
Newsflash: you holding the head of an animal you just killed works for me because I want to know you can provide in the event of a zombie apocolypse or civil war. But, most chicks don't care about that stuff.
I X'd and hearted for about an hour, and found it quite entertaining.
Before I even got done, there were a few dudes who wanted "friendship" and or "liked me". Oooh what an ego boost. But then you gotta read and swipe X or heart again! All the work!
Here's what I found after the first day:
Older men (60 and up) have a LOT of confidence.
Younger men (29 and up) really DO have thing for older women.
A LOT of men have tiny dogs.
Almost everyone has kids, no matter what age. One had 8 kids!!!!
I got "likes" from men from Washington, Oregon (Bend, Hermiston, Pendleton, Ontario), and Idaho.
There were 4 "conversations" that these men started with me.
There were 20 "waves" ...which I assume means "Hey, I'm just gonna toss my face into your inbox and see if you respond."
In about an hour I had over 50 people who liked me. That's 49 men of all ages ranging from 29-79 and one confused woman (I think) who didn't realize I wasn't interested in women. I wasn't sure how many were real people, who were actually looking for what they said, and or how many just wanted my bank account numbers. But, I did realize that Chris, 45, who attended Boise State University is HOT (I may have hearted that one back).
The most intersting thing was that the first man who popped up was the brother of a friend acquantenance (cough) who has been less than nice to me...and trust me, for a second I thought, "Why is there no I'd rather hunt and eat a turtle raw than pick this fucker" button? And then the petty part of me thought, well, if I were 20 years younger I'd totally go after him so I could show up at Thanksgiving dinner with her and the family to torture everyone. But, then I remembered karma is a great equalizer so I don't need to waste my efforts. Come on Karma!!!!!!
So...now what? We'll see what tomorrow brings.
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